Jumboshrimp has always been a fan of themes. Once you give something its own theme, it seems to have more of a purpose. People can attached themselves to a theme. People can believe in a theme. A theme complements the entire production - whether it be a social event, a set of icons for your mobile or an awesome 80’s sitcom starring Gary Coleman. A theme brings it all together in a tight little package.

Take for instance, the so-so months of June, July and August. Individually, rather mundane, but when you string them together, you get Summer (at least in the northern hemisphere). And you know how most people feel about Summer. They plan their entire calendar around those 3 months, the simple whisper of Summer induces fits of juvenile seizures in schools across the country.

Now, we realized that essentially, Summer is a theme, but why-not give a theme…..um, a theme.

Well, regardless of what you think. Jumboshrimp is welcoming back The Summer of ‘_________’.

Once a theme has been determined, you are to adhere to the spirit of that theme. As always, participation is voluntary. Since the inaugural Summer - 2001 ‘The Summer of Discovery’, each following year has been saddled with its own special theme, chosen is a completely un-scientific manner. 2001 was a glorious triumph, while 2004 - ‘The Summer of Menial Labour’ was not a crowd pleaser.

Regardless of obvious flaws in thinking and structure, the goal remains the same - it’s the experience that matters.

So, we have arrived at 2008 - The Summer of Yes. What does this mean? Gone are the days of multiple options for responses. ‘Maybe’ is dead to you. ‘Depends’ is not welcome here. And ‘No’ can wait for the Winter months to show its face. Whatever you are offered, your answer will be an enthusiastic and consistent ‘Yes’! Preferably, the ‘Yes’ will precede the completion of the question.

Scenario 1:

Q: Hey, would you be interested….

A: YES!

Q: …in a BBQ this weekend?

Scenario 2:

Q: Do you want…

A: YES!

Q: this old salsa I am throwing out?

Two completely opposing scenes, but the outcomes are equally awesome.

The ‘Summer of Yes’ is not about what you get for free and it is definitely not for the faint-hearted. It’s about being totally into everything. It’s about being the first to break the inertia. It’s about leading. Why would I do this you ask? Reflect on this statement: If you think life is short, think how short Summer is.

Chew on that science for a wee bit.

And - if you are thinking, ‘Well, this could have been useful info back in April or May. I could have said ‘Yes’ to so many things!’. You just met one of the consequences of ‘The Summer of Yes’, too busy having the most awesome time to blog. It is only August, but Jumboshrimp has already experienced 4 concerts, 2 plays, 4 vernissages, 5 festivals, 14 BBQs, 2 weddings, 7 birthdays, 2 bar-mitzvahs, 1 sighting of Nick Carter, 2 cottages and a grand opening of a Lebanese deli. And these are only the few details my timid manner would allow me to divulge. Anyhoo…

Start now, start today. It has been officially, ‘The Summer of Yes’.

A perfect capp’ to the evening

Let’s face the facts, this fair city of ours is known by a few not-too-flattering statements. Ottawa is a nothing but a government town. Strip-mall/parking lot haven. Where trends/fun/style go to die. If cities were colour coded, Ottawa would be beige. Do I really need to go on? Some are well-deserved, while others are slowly losing their grip on the city’s already mildly bruised ego. Well you can go ahead and add culinary mecca to this notable list. No longer will motorists on the 401 lean forward on the gas pedal as they bypass our little town en route to Montréal. People even flocking here for a tasty morsel or two, what a concept!

While we cannot compete with other metropolitan centres such as Montréal, Toronto or Vancouver for their flare in fashion, entertainment, business and all-around haute chic — where was I going with this — right, there is a little gem of a restaurant that has catapulted Ottawa’s rep as an excellent choice to stuff your gullet, and wash that palette.

Beckta, is housed in…well in a house, a lovely multi-story abode which exudes warmth and charm. While the exterior of the resto says Victorian, its interior is decidedly Mediterranean. A muted palette of colours and finishes offers an overall tranquil setting for some good ‘ol fashion eatin’. Taking its name from its owner, Stephen Beckta, who had cut his teeth in the industry both here and abroad gave this fledgling eatery instant recognition.

Since opening its doors in 2003, Beckta immediately became the place to dine in the city. Enjoyed by luminaries, dignitaries and regular Ottawans just like us. While it had been on our radar, we had not made a trip as yet. Sure we heard the chatter on the street, and we saw the Food Network show documenting their opening, but we still had not made our way down there. But all that changed last week. On that fateful evening, we arrived for our 7:30 pm reservations, ready for a night of slow eating.

From the moment we took our seats, time seemed to ebb forward at a slower pace. Tristan, our main server constantly assured us to take our time and that the night was young and we are in no need to rush any decision/action. Instructions that we took to heart, total dining time…3+ hours. It was a lovely evening of wine, food and conversation. I hear this slow-eating practice is still going strong in regions found outside of North America. How novel!

Since this was our maiden voyage, and we didn’t bring our thinking caps, we placed our lives in Beckta’s capable hands. With a glint in your eye, and a flutter in our chest, we went with the 5 course Tasting Menu along with its wine pairing. Meaning, that the chef Michael Moffat will prepare five selections from the current menu, each course accompanied by a wine selected by Stephen Beckta.

Tell me that doesn’t sound like fun.

This is the dining equivalent to speed dating. The portions are smaller, so you are not committed to the traditional entrée sizes. Perfect for new friends exploring each other. If you liked something, great, and if it didn’t tickle your fancy, also great. But very much unlike speed dating, at the tail end of the evening we were left satisfied and yearning for another encounter. While the pricing may intimidate some, it is well worth the investment.

With each passing course, we savoured each bite, and every sip. Allowing the ingredients to react and interact, setting off synapses in our taste buds. There was a party in our mouths and everyone was invited. During the eating segments of our evening, our conversation of geopolitics and self-discovery was reduced into single prolonged sounds of ‘mmm…ooh…goooood…

The ingredients were fresh, the presentation was impeccable and the marriage of certain dishes with its wine was bold. We only had one course that I thought was pedestrian, but I’m being petty. With each passing course, our expectations were getting loftier and loftier. The Seared Digby Scallops would be the part in the party where someone was changing the vinyl. A little hiccup, but not that big of a deal.

One can not write about Beckta without saluting their utmost dedication to service. Everyone we encountered throughout our ‘stay’ was friendly, knowledgeable and professional. And it is this ardent commitment to customer service that is Beckta’s brightest star. Sure, you can have a world class menu and wine cellar, but it is the human element that creates a joyous ambience. The employees seem to be passionate about their work. You can sense the pride in their manner and decorum. That you cannot fake. Stephen Beckta is rightly recognized for his skills as a sommelier and restauranteur, but he is also adept as a people manager. He has seemed to surround himself with a staff that reflects his passion and pride. And that is the real success of this little restaurant with a big heart.

Bravo Beckta. We should see each other again, soon.

Hey everybody! Feeling rested? Wasn’t yesterday awesome? Well, it’s today, the first day of your Human Zenetic™ life.

Throughout this process, I will present you with small chunks of info that I have coined a Life-Block, which will form the foundation that you will use to build a happier daily existence. Isn’t that cute? Cute yes, but also dead serious. The themes will include the seemingly trivial to the grandiose. We will work on the horizontal plane, where each nugget of knowledge will be intrinsically related, even though their immediate correlation won’t be apparent.

Each Life-Block can be applied individually or stringed together, kind of like those necklaces you used to make in summer camp, yeah just like those, but way less lame. Oh yeah, there won’t be any grading, and coloured belts won’t be given at each successful interval. Growth can’t be measured by framed certificates or gold star stickers silly. I know a lot of you enjoy the constructs of your current existence — a rigid structure laced with time-tested methods and results. Tell me…How the heck is it working out for you so far? (I kind of stole this from that Texan rose Dr. Phil, he won’t mind.) Go on, I’m all ears. So far, you are usually left feeling disappointed and inept. Well you’re finish with that.

Everything I offer, you can take or leave, but I hope you do TAKE, I got way too much lying around inside my huge cranium. I have probably lost some of you already. It’s ok, you’re just not ready yet. You guys should go here, and find some over-packaged temporary semblance of happiness — we’ll talk later. The rest of you, continue reading.

Ok, without further explanatory statements and or justifications (please refer to most previous post) to my qualifications. Roll up or rip off those sleeves, do whatever you do to show the world that you’re ready to do work. Human Zenetics™ starts…right…now.

They say happiness is a state of mind, but it requires physical interpretation also. I am referring to one of those manifestations, the other lesser known silent killer. Let’s talk about PDCs — watyoutalkinbout’willis!? I’m talking about Public Displays of Celebration…er, Willis.

PDCs can make and it can break a relationship. I’ve seen it, you’ve seen it. It’s couples bowling night again, one partner hits a strike or spare or whatever — I hate bowling but indulge me for a moment. Like I said, someone makes a nice bowl, and they turn to their loved one and in celebration, they go in for the high five. The time-space continuum slows down, it’s like watching a car getting t-boned at an intersection. Everyone cringes and turns away, and no one can react fast enough to stop it. What happens? Usually, both completely misses each other’s hands, maybe the timing or the angle is off. Maybe one partner was thinking high ten, resulting in an odd exchange as both individuals try to compensate and mime out what can only be described as air push-ups or a bank hold-up. In the worse case scenario, both are obviously delirious in wanting to end this embarrassment so they can only muster a pathetic grasping of both hands as they shake violently. Think Tom Cruise vs Oprah Winfrey.

Whatever the case, it’s sad. The results can only be public humiliation, completely negating the actual positive achievement that called for the PDC in the first place. It says that we as union of two individuals have a total lack of cohesion, communication and self-awareness.

What do they get wrong? They didn’t practice. Parallel parking, you’d practice — same with baking a lemon meringue pie, so why not this? They assumed that everyone is on the same PDC page. But the PDC play book is voluminous and diverse. You got everything to the standard high/low 5 to the chest bump all the way to the elaborate 21 hit combo ending with the six-shooters to the sky. As a novice, I suggest you aim low. Keep it simple and you will undoubtedly avoid humiliation and or injury. The advanced PDCs is best left for college roomies and lodge buddies.

So which PDC is right for you? That I do not know, for a leopard can not ask the elephant to pick its spots. You will have to learn and grow, and feel it out. DO NOT FORCE THE ISSUE. You might be thinking — hey jerk-face, save us the Zen crap about leopards and spots and tell us what you do?

Ok, first off I don’t appreciate the animosity. But I can understand your exuberance. I like your moxie. As for my partner and I, we were lucky. Without much discussion or ground work, we settled on what is often referred to as the ‘Silent Scholar’. Think a clap with no sound or catching a butterfly. If one person starts high, then other immediately goes low. This is the important part. High always initiates the motion and contact. Low just plays it real cool and waits for the action. But it is silent, you are trapping the butterfly, not crushing it to smithereens. The Silent Scholar is demure and polite, it doesn’t call for attention. Just the way we like it. Sometimes when things are really awesome, we upgrade to the Southside Slide. This starts as the Silent Scholar but the ‘Low’ meets the ‘High’ at the last moment and pulls in for some skin. It’s a wee more flash for your dollar. But is it right for you? Search your heart.
Some of you are saying, great tip; but I am single, I have no one to celebrate with. To you I say this, I have seen groups of beer swilling, hardcore sports buddies completely muck-up the post- touchdown or 360 windmill dunk celebration. Hey, you just got an ‘A’ on mid-term…PDC! What? Your dad woke up from his coma? I am gonna go ahead and order up a PDC! PDCs affect all of us. And practicing or developing your own standard move will strengthen any relationship. Having a set game plan for your PDCs allows you to traverse that crucial moment with confidence and ease, and it allows you to roll on through to the good times.

Will either of those techniques mentioned earlier work for you? Tough call. Again, I suggest you try before you buy. There will be no hand-holding through out our journey together, I am only providing you with these different yarns, but the onus will be on you to knit that beautiful technicolour sweater-vest that is your life. Isn’t that a superb analogy?

No? Try this one on. I will serve you these how-to edibles, but you have to chew, and digest it yourself. Better?

OK (insert your name), you were great. Get out there, remember to keep it simple and have some fun!

Hey everyone, how are things? Good good. Interested in knowing how it can get even better?

I totally knew you would be.

Ok, Let me explain…I have been successfully married for about 7 months now, and before that I was in 4 separate long-term relationships with an average life-span of 3.15 years. I am 31 years of age, so you do the math. OK, don’t bother, that equals me being super knowledgeable about the world of dating and relationships. So I figured, hey every ‘mo out there is dishing out advice like it was going out of fashion. Why not me? You got your books, your dvds, your audio tapes, your gurus, your Montel Williams, etc. etc. Everyone and their cousin Leonard is an ‘expert’. Go ahead and roll your eyes. Heck, I just heard Dr. Phil McGraw isn’t even a real doctor. I know — crazy! Anyways, everyone is capitalizing on it. People are desperate and telephone psychics costs money. But now here, and not now. I am doing this for free. Why? Because I like you. And I mean a lot.

Put down that Chicken Soup for the Soul and prepare yourself for some good old learnin’! Welcome to Jumboshrimp and the Guide to Happy (lawyers are ironing out the copyright details as we speak, so don’t even think of stealing that awesome name). I thought about giving it a more relationship-specific title, like ‘You and your first mate: What happens when the ship goes down’. But let’s be honest, it was stupid and not everybody appreciates a nautical theme. Then it hit me, I am moderately knowledgeable about tons of stuff. Why not share all of it? Gosh, I wish I was one of you. Lucky!

Ok, before I crack my head open and show you all the meaty know-how locked inside. I want to get some things clear. That’s just how I roll dawgs. I want utter transparency — you mean that much to me. I am a professional of Human Zenetics™, professional in the sense that I have the ability to print my own business cards and I kind of made up this field of practise about 5 minutes ago. Google returned with zero results for: human zenetic. It is that new and revolutionary. Do you know how many episodes of the View dealt with this subject, how about a fat zero.

Don’t be alarmed, relax and put down your notepad and that fancy image capturing device of yours. I will present these tiny morsels of genius is small edible chunks. Any expert worth their salt knows that the path to personal development and fulfilment is a slow and steady jog and not a mad dash with your arms flailing all over the place.

Before I continue, you might want to check some email or watch a lovely pet video on Youtube. I am going to need you to focus when we do some work. Better yet, get off the inter-webs and go play outside for a little bit.

Go on. Go.

Not an actual photo of Team Basketcases

Let it be known that in the year of our Lord, two-thousand and seven, on the eleventh day of the fourth month, during the nineteenth hour, the tranquil city of Ottawa, Canada grabbed the world of athletics by its nutsack and exclaimed — I own you bitch. No truer words have ever been spoken. With a clutch and a half-twist, sport followers sat up and took notice.

Regardless of event or activity, this city produces winners — no, dare I say CHAMPIONS.

I present to the members of the jury, Exhibit ‘A’:

Team ‘Basketcases’ of the Alcatel Basketball League. Go ahead and enjoy the hilarious wordplay in the team name. I’ll wait. All season long, this fun-loving gang of jump shooters played with conviction and moxie. They weren’t paid, they didn’t have matching uniforms and except for the janitorial staff and few loiterers…they didn’t even have fans. What they lacked in shoe endorsements and fan adoration, they made up in passion. They played each and every game for the world, they played for the young, the old, the infirmed. They played for every goddam man, woman, child. Don’t worry, they had enough heart for everyone.

The season reached an apex with the championship finals against the ‘X-men’. Team Basketcases had been decimated with injuries and lost of 2 key team members for the entire play-offs. It didn’t look good for our guys. Only 5 players were on hand for the final game, against 11 on the side of the X-men. If betting was allowed in the Alcatel League, the Vegas line on Basketcases would have been downright sad. It would have be a fool’s bet. From tip-off to the final buzzer. The teams were neck and neck. The X-men’s game plan was simple, run these guys to the ground. Surely, Team Basketcases didn’t have the physical stamina to maintain their play the entire 60 minutes. Or did they? At the half way mark, trailing by 4 points, the lads of Basketcases willed their way back into the game. With sheer grit, they transformed the deficit into a 10 point lead. Someone call the Vatican, a miracle took place in Ottawa last night. Like two heavyweights exchanging kidney shots, the teams battled. Enduring fatigue, bruises and multiple pulled groins, Team Basketcases held on for 4 point victory. A triumphant score of 36 – 32. An ugly eye-gouging, neck-elbowing affair. Every fouling situation in the modern rule book came into play. For a team that averaged 65+ points a game during the season, this was not an exhibition in offencive prowess. Offence may wins fanfare, but defense wins championships. Call it a shout-out to those hallowed Detroit Pistons ‘Bad Boys’ days. Can I get a Bill Laimbeer up in this mother? Words like poetic, and fluidity and beauty will never be used to described this victory. But for the rest of the summer, bragging rights belong to Team Basketcases. Prolly the greatest basketball squad in the Greater Ottawa-Gatineau area (to grace the Alcatel Basketball League). Champions of the League!

If this wasn’t enough to seal the case, I continue by presenting to you Exhibit ‘B‘:

The Ottawa Senators laid the smack down on Sidney Crosby and the Pittsburgh Penguins. The Sens won game 1 of the first round by a 6 - 3 count. Surely on the road to their inaugural Stanley Cup victory. Conversely, a true show of offencive dominance.

And finally, to round out my air-tight argument, may I direct the court’s attention to Exhibit ‘C’:

The Ottawa Lynx (Baltimore Oriole AAA affiliate), fresh from fending off an off-season hostile take-over bid by evil Nolan Ryan. They had to start the season under a cloud of rumours and hearsay. Even with the constant threat of being boxed up and moved out of town looming, the team pulled up their socks, and doubled the Buffalo Bisons 13 – 7 in an early season match-up. Can you say owned?

In conclusion, I have presented to thee the 3-headed sporting behemoth that is Ottawa, Canada. A rabid, prolific winning machine. Let it be known on Wednesday, April 11, 2007 that this city be forever known as the City of Champions.

I rest my case. Game. Set. Match.

The following is the second instalment in a series of podcasts called ‘Conversations’. The list of the invited will span a diverse selection, which may include artists, musicians, politicians, activists, entrepreneurs and maybe even my father.

Episode Two is a conversation I had with Melanie Yugo and Jason Pelletier, the duo behind ‘Spins and Needles‘. A local Ottawa social event that combines a night of fun crafting projects set to a funky beat. I learn about their goals, experiences and current campaign for global domination.

NOTE: Unfortunately, we chose to sit right next HVAC unit. Duh. Apologies for the the poor audio quality.

For more information on their upcoming events, or DJ Jason Pelletier’s music and weekly sessions, visit the following :

www.spinsandneedles.com

www.myspace.com/jasonskilz

www.technoetc.net

Discovery is not a child-centric activity, but it’s sure feels like it. Well, at least for this little buckeroo.

At the exact moment when my mind registers a ‘discovery’ I experience an auto-somatic episode for a brief period. I can not quantify the length of time, but I revert to the young boy that had often sought out and enjoyed lifting up random rocks, discarded debris or moldy newspapers to simply find what lies underneath. This happens to me. EVERY. TIME.

I have this existential replay of me lifting up the symbolic rock. Kind of like the Quality Assurance station along the assembly line of memories, emotions and experiences that is my psyche. ‘It’s confirmed! We have a new discovery! Commence euphoric brain activity! Stat. Activate ear-to-ear smiling mechanism. Go. Go. Go.‘

Currently, that activity of discovery often involves scavenging through various decrepit pockets of the inter-webs. While trolling the National Public Radio website in search of some reprieve from ‘Wednesday, Day 3 of 5 for employee 30725, occupier of cornerish-window cubicle 225, 5^TH floor, building C, National Office campus. The factory was pushed into motion by a little nugget by the name of Intelligence Squared US, a podcast of oxford-style debates, complete with action grip moderator! The debaters are harvested from the upper echelons of academia and other relevant fields of knowledge. Three for the motion, three against. Throw in a hot-button issue and debate! My introduction into this program was the proposition of ‘Is America Too Damn Religious?‘. And this one was a hum-dinger. The series is produced by the WNYC, New York Public Radio. All debates are taped in front of a live audience in New York City, who are polled pre and post debate. Its root is from the British production that began in 2002. I eagerly await a Canadian version to be rolled out by the CBC.

Debate is an essential apparatus of education and critical thinking. No matter what your stance is, it is always beneficial to view a topic from as many vantage point as possible. For or against, these debaters present their case in an objective and eloquent manner.

And that’s hot.

A face made for radio

Some people think Ottawa’s radio scene is pretty weak school. As an assessment, that would be pretty bang-on. The landscape in the nation’s capital is replete with ‘commercial’ national behemoths belting out a repetitive medley of ‘hits’, also known as the pay-for-play system. Meaning a handful of records companies pays a fee for their latest and greatest focus-tested musical frankensteins to gain some exposure. They throw in the odd oldie from the 80’s or 90’s to give the illusion that the ‘DJ’ is still involved with the music selection. They are a couple of self-proclaimed ‘genre-busting’ stations, but if you happen to listen to one for an entire day, you would quickly realize that the fix was in. Modern disc jockeys are no more than glorified talking heads, with little to no power in the decision making process. Who’s at fault? The industry has drastically changed in the last 3 decades. The bottom line has seeped its way into the creative process, and the end product is plastic and bland.

Sandwiched between inane talk/sport radio on the AM dial, and commercial slop on the FM side are a few gems that have kept on chugging along the pulse of the city. Carleton University’s CKCU 93.1 FM has been a trailblazer since 1975, when it became the nation’s first on-campus radio station. Ottawa University’s CHUO 89.1 FM first got clearance from CRTC in 1984. CKDJ 107.9 FM officially joined the party as Algonquin College’s on-campus station in 2003. These 3 community radio stations provide a voice for the diverse group of individuals that make this city shine. Economics does play a role within the community radio scene, they heavily rely on the financial donations and volunteers. Their detractors would cite the lack of unprofessionalism of some of the productions (see photo above), but as a vehicle to drive community involvement. There is no better option. Some shows have been on the airwaves for 25+ years, building a loyal audience along the way.

On any given day, you can find unique programming catering to a very eclectic audio palette. No where on commercial radio will you find reggae, alt indie rock, vietnamese news, hip hop, deep house, french folk and a salsa show within its daily line-up. And that’s just on an ordinary Wednesday afternoon. I have only given a small snippet of the what is out there on the Ottawa airwaves. Forget about simple bilingual programming, try polylingual!

Give the dial a workout, and give these stations a listen, there’s a program out there waiting for your ears. You are not chained to your radios either, all of these stations are streamed online. These stations are a true reflection of our community, you might hear yourself in the mirror.